Category Archives: Family

Thats How I learnt Algebra!

DAD: Do exercise 5, question number 3, 4, and 7.

[a few minutes later]

ME: Here it is!

DAD: [ONE TIGHT SLAP!!!!] You can’t even do such an easy algebra question. You missed a negative sign in the answer.

ME: (while looking at my notebook) (sobbing) But I have a negative sign there!

DAD: You have such a bad handwriting, son. Go and write a page in English and that should be in good handwriting. We will do algebra after that.

200th Post, Oddballs, and Trains

Friday Night, 200th Post, a coffee mug filled with warm water, a new computer mouse, a stack of New Yorkers, a crappy external monitor, and no ideas.

I am amazed that I am still writing. 199 posts, most of them nonsense, except a few which are ‘emo teen’ type. (so much for my retarded growth). I am amazed that I am still writing. I am amazed, there are still things out there that amaze me. I am amazed that I have not gone numb. I am amazed that soggy winds have not bogged me down. I am amazed that some people still smile, when they read me.

Frankly, I would tell the truth here, (for a change), I came pretty close to quitting this blog, donning my superhero costume, and save the world by turning earth the other way round! But then, realized that costume does not fit. Though, the keys on my macbook still fit my fingers. So I came back! So, for now…

1)   I will continue trying to blow your brains out.

2)   I will continue pretending that real world does not exist, its hidden somewhere in warped ink on paper.

3)   I will continue to pretend that If my parents had not dropped me on head, I wouldn’t have been the way I am. (they still fight as to which one of them dropped me)

4)   I will continue to believe that I am an android whose circuitry has gone bad.

5)   I will continue to believe that solution to everything lies in not finding sense but in living the antisense.

Just to leave you with something; here is a video, where some oddball decided to walk up in front of an express train, lay down safely on the tracks, let the train speed over her, got up, dropped her slippers, picked them and walked back home!

“Momma! I am bored! It is 10:15 AM, 43rd Pennsylvanian would be on tracks soon, let me have a nap under it, I would be back soon…cya..”

Ok!! Embedding not working… Click here for the video .

Cross Lines, Cave Drawing/Cartoons

Earlier this morning, while I am in deep sleep, I get this absolutely amazing idea for a cartoon (at least it seemed like an amazing idea at that time), so I wake up all of a sudden, run out naked on streets shouting, “eureka eureka”. Okay, the last part is not true! But, I did get an idea.

Later, in the evening, I pull out my notepad and start working on drawing the idea on paper.  And that’s when hell lets loose on myself; I realize I am pretty bad at drawing, I have absolutely no idea as to what I should draw, and I have forgot most of my dream.

It is not that I was trying to draw next generation of graphic novels or manga; even when I started drawing, I only had stick drawings in my mind, but, as it turns out I can’t even make stick figures, which tells you that a caveman is more talented than me. For one of the panel drawings, I had to show confused look on a character, but to my horror, in the end product it looked like he was blushing.

A few hours into the process, and I realize that besides driving a gas guzzler Jeep Cherokee for one full year, this cartoon drawing has become one of my most Environment un-friendly act of sorts. I have run out of my pages in my notepad, my trash can is full of papers, and I am feeling more frustrated than ever.

After I get anything that looks like something, I scan it and then send it to my friend by mail. Review time, you see!

He calls me in no time and he goes, “Sorry, I did not understand it…”

Now, I would have taken it as a compliment had I wished to next Pablo Picasso, but it is a cartoon, so I start explaining him. “See, in first panel, the guy on left is actually a  guy, and the girl on right is actually a girl, and the guy actually ….blah blah….aliens……full circle……reality…..” and then after he pleads for me to stop speaking, I tell him how much time I spent in making that cartoon.

He says, “Why don’t you draw a cartoon of you drawing a cartoon?”

I won’t deny but it seemed like a nice idea, but I gave it a second thought and replied, “ Can’t, that is too complex of a subject matter for my abilities” and then added, “but I can sure write about it.”

Here it is my own Cross-lines and Cave Drawing:

Untitled

Of Dampners

Dear Sis,

Remember that girl I told you about…you know what, I think I might be in love with her…like you know every time she sends me a mail or something, I just can’t avoid reading it over and over again. I read them minimum like 5-10 times. Do you think I am going crazy over her…what do you think I should do?

Reply fast!

G

Re:

My dear young stupid brother,

Don’t do anything…just go and consult a doctor or something because you might be suffering from “short term memory loss” J and that’s why you have to read her mails over and over again……

And yeah, I don’t know which one of “the ones that you told me about” are we talking here.  Don’t forget you need to get me my special chocolate, so that I can keep my mouth shut in front of Mom and Dad.

Cheers!

K

Re:Re:

Sis!!!!!

Oh shut up! I mentioned only one…ok maybe two…but this is the one that I met at Barnes and Noble…..anyways, do you think its pretty normal that you can’t really focus on what somebody is saying really….like somebody is saying, you are just glad that they are speaking to you..words don’t matter!

G

Re: Re: Re:

Dear Bro,

Its normal only if you are suffering from Attention Deficit Disorder….still, as I said, don’t do anything stupid!

Cheers!

K