Unlikely Things to Hear in a Cricket Commentry

“In earlier over, you witnessed that there was a minor tiff between the bowler and batsman. Now, the good news is that they have both decided to sort their differences, but the bad news is that they have decided to do so by the medium of a duel.”

“Rahul Dravid is still on 14 not out, before he moves to 15, I will tell you recipes for chocolate chip cookies, and a vegetarian lasagnia.”

“……so where were we? Yes! You were saying that your grandpa could hit a six which would be two miles long. Well, take it you moron, my grandpa, once hit a six that landed in a totally different city.”

“Actually what happened was that batsman first said BLEEP, then bowler replied and said BLEEP, then wicketkeeper intervened with BLEEP BLEEP, but the BLEEEP umpire did nothing. By this time it was BLEEEP to BLEEEP was BLEEEEP is to BLEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP”

“Important announcement: Shoaib has just started his run-up from our launch station situated 2 miles away. Batsmen and fielders should be at their positions in 15 minutes”

“Victory of Xinghala tribe over Australian team has once again proven that bats made out human bones are better than willow.”

“One team will win, one team will lose, or it will be a tie. Who cares, its all shite anyways? Lets talk about better things in life, like me and kathy……”

“Winner of the world cup final will be decided by popular vote. If you think Team India should win then text 7774, and if you think Team Australia should win then text 7733.”

“Playing with a grenade in place of cricket ball, has made this game even more exciting.”

[I think it is Anuradha who had asked me to do this one long time back. Since I am undergoing a severe bout of insomnia tonight, and a bit clogged in my head, here it is, my generosity towards my readers. Anybody else wants to read anything else. Let me know! :)]

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9 thoughts on “Unlikely Things to Hear in a Cricket Commentry

  1. […] Cricket commentary of a different kind! […]

  2. Nikita says:

    lol lol lol

    not amused by the remarks on dravid, though. i seriously wanted to like marry him about 7 years back! 😛

  3. Gaurav says:

    Thanks! well wasn’t it the time when almost every other girl wanted to marry Dravid and he ended up marrying somebody who seemed like she had won “marry dravid” after scratching a card found in bath soap! 🙂

  4. Anuradha Kushwanshi says:

    Thanks Gaurav.. 🙂
    I guess everyone is paranoid after the 3 Idiots/Chetan Bhagat controversy.. One never fails to give credits now!! 😀
    Nice post.. once again.

    “India has won the toss and is in field with only 9 part-time players today. Yuvraj Singh and M.S. Dhoni decided to bunk this match at the last moment. They have left a note in the dressing room that winning Rakhi ji in ‘Rakhi Ka Swayambar-2’ is better than losing to Trinidad. BCCI might fine them with 80% of their next hair-gel endorsement fees for this.
    Now let’s get back to chocolate chip cookies.”

  5. Gauri says:

    the blog’s getting better and better 🙂 loved the dravid one and of course, the text messaging option

  6. Ankur says:

    What if Dravid & Shoaib are combined….people will age & die watching the match only!!!

  7. Swati says:

    Awesome Commentary ! Hahahahhaah @ bleeep bleeeep….. so irrittating it can get ! 😛

  8. Debleena says:

    lol good one bhardwaj !

    u know i wont be surprised if they do ask us to msg our votes in for the best team !! all the competitions on tv are driving me crazy, after all the talent shown, the ppl with maximum votes win !!

    @nikita..totally agree 😉

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