Subscription Card Woes!

 

I know, I am not the second most environment friendly guy on the face of this earth, first spot has already been assigned to Al Gore, but I am still one of those concerned ones. I once came so near to donating 20$ every month to WWF after watching a video clip of a polar bear standing on a small chunk of ice. I felt so much sympathy for the poor creature who was going to die by drowning as a result of global warming. For a second I even imagined a scene where I insert keys into my car, and keys changed into nails of a transparent polar bear’s coffin. I was about to push ‘Submit’ on the payment option when the polar bear jumped in water and started swimming. I never clicked submit. 

 

But there are issues that I take very seriously. Take for example, those magazine subscription cards that are there, loosely hanging between every couple of pages. I absolutely abhor them. I actually hate them so much not because wasting too much paper on is not environment friendly, but more so because they endanger my very existence in my room. They come in so much bulk that if I don’t clean them regularly, I might have to walk, sit and sleep on them.  Also they always tell my visitors that I never read most of the magazines I subscribe to. I sometimes wish that I could eat them. Food Crisis at my home would have been over.

 

15% off on new subscriptions!

Gift your loved one a gift of adventure!

Save $15 on your subscription.

 

Firstly, I already have a subscription. Don’t you guys have that information in your records.  Can’t you send my magazine ‘subscription card free’.

 

Secondly, never ever show me a card that has subscription rate $5 less than what I actually paid you last month. I feel cheated!

 

Thirdly, if you do send me so many cards, please don’t put that line at the back of card saying, “This offer cannot be combined with any other offer”.

 

And, please try to save some trees. They are important, and also if you save some of them today, you might be able to publish one issue more than others in future.

 

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