Professional Suicide Note Writer

I am thinking of taking up a new profession. And I am pretty serious about changing courses this time. For last some weeks, I have been pondering over the issue of becoming a Professional Suicide Note Writer. Very few people realize the importance of putting their last thoughts in an easy to understand and thought provoking form. And even out of the ones who realize the importance of doing so, very few are able to put all their thoughts in a single A4 sheet. So I have decided to take up a job which actually helps mankind. Specially the kind in distress!!

Ok, here is the deal:

My client fills the details about reasons why he is pissed off with life.

He tells me the date and time, so that I can deliver it before that date.

All the notes would be typewritten (Client can choose the font..even Wingdings!!)

The writer is not responsible if cops or somebody barges into your destined place and prevents you from committing suicide.

The writer or his firm does not support “Suicide” in any form. As a matter of fact we are totally against it. But we are all professionals. Right!!

While writing this one I thought of an idea for a Movie. Here it goes:

A professional suicide note writer pens down a suicide note for a celebrity actress. But after reading the note the actress is so inspired by life that she gives up on her plan. But if she does not die, the writer loses his claim to fame. So he in turn goes ahead and kills the actress so that note reaches press and he gets his 15 sec of fame!!!

Applause Applause!!!

Quentin reading this?!!

4 thoughts on “Professional Suicide Note Writer

  1. mo79uk says:

    That actually sounds like an interesting story. Can I have a cameo role as a delivery boy? (I don’t mind having to wearing huge fake blood bags for a gory demise)

  2. Gaurav says:

    lol…yup sure you are in!! but bring your own blood bags (fake or real..I don’t care!!) šŸ™‚

  3. swati says:

    kudos sir šŸ˜€ .. u’ll actually earn d blessings of all the frustrated souls of USBT :p

  4. Gaurav says:


    great!! case of USBT students, I don’t even need to know the detailed reason for writing the note!! šŸ˜®

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